Paint it black

You might think that being in the unfortunate position of having to board up a window to protect it from hoopleheads and gopniki that you had done enough to safeguard your property. You might think that but you would be making the rookie mistake of forgetting the petty pen pushers who work for the Council's Environmental Crime Unit (a group of mendacious ninnies who pick on the poorest and ignore the rich, t'was ever thus). They will sooner or later come upon your works and inform you that this is far from adequate; you must "Paint it black" or face an enforcement order so to do! Yes a good lick of black gloss it seems is the sine qua non of window protection.

The weekend in black and white is here.