Sorry! Not in service

This is Hull: Unique. Lively. Historical. Exciting. Friendly. Colourful. Cultural. Artistic. Limitless. And Sorry! Not in service.

The other day we went for a bus home at the bus station or Hull Interchange. We had, we thought, just missed our bus but as we entered the bus station we could see our bus waiting in a massive queue of buses trying to get into (and out of) the bus station ... we had reckoned without the power of the Hull time shift which magically slows down time to match the user. So it was that our bus was some ten minutes late getting into the station and though we boarded immediately it took some twenty minutes to leave the station. The journey home though was rapid, there being no traffic on the roads by that time. The driver as we got off (or debussed as some have it) apologised for being late ... well no worries, mate and thank you driver!.

So what was the cause of this town wide disruption? ... a small accident on one road; that's all it took to feed back and gridlock the whole town for a couple of hours. This was not a one-off event it happens two, three times a week, sometimes two, three times a day.  A survey recently made the town to be the fifth worse in the country for road delays despite being nowhere near the top five in size, I think it's about twentieth. Still this being Hull no doubt someone is working to take the place to the top of the list ...

Oh and while we're on the subject of Hull and mildly silly ideas ... the town council has just written to the Government to ask it to allow it to try out a Universal Income scheme. You might not have heard, it's a scheme to give everybody Government money (£100 per week is the sum mentioned) regardless of need. Yup sounds stupid, is stupid;  which is why the idea got cross party support in Stupidville.

"Looks like an accident in the cutlery drawer"

Over last weekend and to the annoyance of many gridlocked motorists Castle Street was blocked off and the new footbridge (which we last saw parked up in preparation in a car park a few weeks ago) was shuffled into position in a faultless manner and much quicker than expected. The road was reopened fifteen hours earlier than forecast to much rejoicing. The bridge is only the small matter of thirty odd years late (who's counting?) ... and it won't be fit for pedestrians until spring.

The title was Margot's comment upon first seeing this. "Like the dish ran away with the spoon?" said I. Still you don't have to look at it when you're on it.

The weekend in Black and White is here.

A road by any other name ...

You know how towns like to honour folk by naming streets after them: so this town has a Larkin Close; an appropriately dull cul-de-sac, Alfred Gelder Street, Jameson Street, and Ferensway , of course; that local turncoat John Hotham from the civil war times gets a road along with Sir Thomas, Lord Fairfax who gets an avenue; there must be dozens more: Raich Carter Way, Blundell's Corner spring to mind as I write... just outside Hull, across the road from me, there's a short avenue named after a guy who wanted to be Lord Glencoe but somehow the connotations of bloody massacre made him change to Lord Strathcona ... so, anyway,  the other year they decided to rename Garrison Road as Roger Millward Way. I'm not sure that this is any kind of honour since Garrison Road as was is really just an extension of the dreaded A63/Castle Street, the bane of motorists' lives and a right pain in the nethers to cross at times... and I wonder how many even know about this or whether the name will catch on ... when they finally get home, will the motorists of this fair town put their feet up, wrap their hands round a well deserved hot brew and say "oh that *beeeep* traffic on Roger Millward Way was such a *beeeep* disgrace" ... nah not going to happen, ever.
I won't pretend to know anything about who or what Roger Millward was, some sporty bloke, so I've heard,  rugby league, really, really not my scene ...

I mentioned today and several times before that this road is  a pain to cross and that young men have been seen to turn into grey beard loons waiting, funeral directors have been spotted lurking for falling stock ... well some concerned person has put up a plaque to let the world know that those who wait may be gone but are not forgotten, not lost just gone before ...

I'm not driving

Rolled up in town late on Friday afternoon about 4pm but could tell something was up as the bus diverted and left us to get off on a side street. The reason was obvious; each street in town was filled with traffic going absolutely nowhere at all. I wonder if you ever played that game as a child where you had to move from place to place without touching the ground? We called it Pirates, you might have called it something else. Anyhow you could play Pirates all round town on the roofs of cars stretching from the river to Beverley Road and all other points west and east. And the reason so many hundreds of vehicles decided to use the centre of town ... someone decided to play with the Myton Bridge and oops, oh dear ... it broke down. Hmmm ...

The picture was taken last year on Spring Bank, another notorious bottle neck. It's a stretch of about one thousand yards and my personal record for rush hour slowness on here is twenty five minutes; that's a little over 1 mile per hour! Even I can walk quicker than that.

The Long Wait

It's been a while since I posted about Castle Street and its problems. I know you'll be wanting to see how much amazing progress has been made in alleviating this black spot. Well I can tell you that, after the fourth delay, absolutely and definitely work will not start until 2020 at the very earliest and will almost certainly possibly be finished by 2025 that is assuming that the Highways Agency is still going then (they could all be drawing their pensions before this gets built) and as this is their most difficult project to date they might just swoon and faint with all the complications. Apparently the HA needs to "resolve technical and practical challenges" I hope that is official  speak for pulling its finger out but I doubt it. To put this delay into some kind of perspective, this country will negotiate its exit from the EU within a year and a bit  by 2019! A person might reasonably assume then that the delay is due not to technical issues but to a lack of political will. If this was in London then firstly the problem would never have arisen and secondly if it did it would have been resolved years ago. So, anyhow, I won't need to post about this for another three years, unless something happens again to delay things, which seems highly unlikely don't you think?

The glorious £250 million plan, in case you're interested, is, put simply, to drop the road at this junction by twenty odd feet so traffic can cross over it without traffic lights. Seems easy enough to this pilgrim but then I know nothing of the "technical and practical challenges". The video below allows you to fly along some future Castle Street, the way things stand this may the closest this plan gets to taking off.

Going right round the houses

The cars down below were aiming to get on the road up above and had to go the scenic route right through old town; but thanks to these traffic lights they were crawling along at less than walking speed. I hope they enjoyed the culture while they were waiting. This was the scene yesterday and I hear there is another gridlock in town right now but that's just normal for a Friday.

What, will the line stretch out to the crack of doom?

Here's a familiar sight on a Friday evening on Beverley Road, traffic tailing back to the town centre and not moving much faster than a horse and cart did two centuries ago. But this is bliss compared to the predicted Carmageddon to come on Monday and Tuesday when a section of Ferensway is to be completely closed to allow the completion of some road improvement. A three mile diversion (!) has been put in place involving crossing the river twice. Now even at the best of times those river crossings are bottlenecks and with all the extra traffic it's going to be so much fun. The official advice is to take a bus instead of your car but being stuck on a bus in giant gridlock wont improve things much. My advice: stay in bed.

The weekend in black and white is here.

Expect Delays

I may have mention once or twice the problem that is Castle Street and that money had been agreed for a grand plan to alleviate some of the mess that is caused by funnelling a motorway into a inner-city dual carriageway. By now the detailed plans should be available, well it is well known that "should" butters no parsnips. These plans will not now be available until next Springtime (when birds do sing hey ding a ding, ding). I'm all for measuring twice and cutting once but to keep on putting things back will mean the actual work will neatly coincide with that other Hull problem the 2017 City of Culture. (One of themes I have heard is to be "Roots and Routes" so maybe it's all part of fiendish plan.) Drivers and that includes visitors to the cultural delights will be advised to take alternative routes, that is shorthand for find your own way through the infernal gridlock, matey, you're on your own! You have been warned.

Traffic Lights

OK what can I possibly say about this? In December 1868 the world's first traffic lights came into operation near Westminster Bridge in London. They were gas lit and unfortunately within a month had sprung a leak and blown up resulting in the policeman who was operating them suffering severe burns and, according to some sources, dying from his injuries. Things have moved on a bit and now there must be millions of these devices at junctions all across the world. There's a fair few here at the junction of Holderness Road and Mount Pleasant. There's precious little to say about this junction except that it's oft times busy and the sooner you can get away from it the better. I'm sorry I can't imagine what I was thinking taking such a dull picture and inflicting it on the world. 

If celebrating Australia Day (or Invasion Day if you wish) tickles your fancy then some City Daily Photo bloggers are posting about this here.

Keeping Hull Moving

The owner of this car is in for a shock when he/she returns. A civil enforcement officer has spotted an alleged infringement and is issuing a penalty charge notice. I think it must be the uniform that attracts this kind of officious person, before this he'd taken 3 or 4 photos as evidence of the alleged offence. I bet he enjoys his work and the uniform that goes with it.

According to Hull City Council civil parking enforcement will "encourage correct, sensible and safe parking in Hull" and "keep Hull moving". "CPE will improve parking by ensuring that parking bays are not abused ..."
As you will have noticed this car is clearly abusing the parking bay (simply by being in it?) and hindering traffic ( it's tyre is a whole inch over the line!) and is parked so badly as to cause Hull to grind to a halt (allegedly).

I'm not a driver and so the parking regulations do not affect me personally but I cannot see how jumping on each and every minor infringement is going to achieve improved parking. It just becomes a money making scheme (up to £70 for an offence) and brings the whole scheme nothing but disrepute.