"Looks like an accident in the cutlery drawer"

Over last weekend and to the annoyance of many gridlocked motorists Castle Street was blocked off and the new footbridge (which we last saw parked up in preparation in a car park a few weeks ago) was shuffled into position in a faultless manner and much quicker than expected. The road was reopened fifteen hours earlier than forecast to much rejoicing. The bridge is only the small matter of thirty odd years late (who's counting?) ... and it won't be fit for pedestrians until spring.

The title was Margot's comment upon first seeing this. "Like the dish ran away with the spoon?" said I. Still you don't have to look at it when you're on it.

The weekend in Black and White is here.

Are you ready for Brexit?

 J. Heebink is a Dutch transport firm with bases in Manchester and MIlton Keynes. Their bright orange lorries are a common sight on Castle Street as they head to and from the port. They've been in business for decades and with a bit of  common sense from all parties, will keep on trucking for many decades to come.

The theme for this month is orange. 

At the end of this month, if certain folk are to be believed and the UK does finally leave the protection racket known as the European Union, the sky will fall in, this country will run out of medicines, food, fuel, folk will be put out of work and we will collapse into a state of complete paralysis with lorries unable to transport goods to and from the EU. This will only happen if the EU chooses to make it happen, let us be clear, it will be their choice to mess with trade; someone, somewhere will have to choose to block or delay the transport of vital medicines...  thus showing what inhuman bastards they have been all along.
It's poppycock (a fine Dutch word), of course, but that is how these scaremongering idiots work. I've given up on the political machinations going on in Parliament, plots here, plots there, plots against plots, court cases to reverse the PM's actions, plots to change the PM, rumours of plots, denials of rumours and you think it and it is happening (possibly, who knows? who cares any longer?) ... all keep the BBC (the biased broadcasting conspiracy) salivating. This parliament is simply not working, the government cannot govern, the supposedly neutral Speaker is in cahoots and conspiring with the Opposition, ... The people cannot have an election because the Opposition is rightly scared of the result and won't let them, so much for democracy. It all boils to one thing: are they, a few hundred MPs, really going to overturn the votes of 17.4 million people and block Brexit completely? Do they think they can get away with it? Well the answer to that is, suck it and see: Oh the Great Reckoning there will be!
Meanwhile the Government is putting out adverts with the question: "Are you ready for Brexit?" to which my answer (and I guess a lot of others) is "Just get a bloody move on ..."

Just don't drop it

What's this? Some kind of fair ground attraction at the back of Staples, a place well known for attractions of an all together different sort? No, not even close.

Back in April I mentioned that work had started on building a footbridge across Castle Street. Well in the past few days in this car park just a few yards down the road this has spring  up. Yes, it looks like the long awaited bridge just needs lifting up and putting in the right place and we should be good to trot. But quite how you lift a girt heavy and wide load like this and place it with pinpoint accuracy on its supports is thankfully not my concern. Let's just hope they don't drop it.

The Weekend in Black and White is here.

A road by any other name ...

You know how towns like to honour folk by naming streets after them: so this town has a Larkin Close; an appropriately dull cul-de-sac, Alfred Gelder Street, Jameson Street, and Ferensway , of course; that local turncoat John Hotham from the civil war times gets a road along with Sir Thomas, Lord Fairfax who gets an avenue; there must be dozens more: Raich Carter Way, Blundell's Corner spring to mind as I write... just outside Hull, across the road from me, there's a short avenue named after a guy who wanted to be Lord Glencoe but somehow the connotations of bloody massacre made him change to Lord Strathcona ... so, anyway,  the other year they decided to rename Garrison Road as Roger Millward Way. I'm not sure that this is any kind of honour since Garrison Road as was is really just an extension of the dreaded A63/Castle Street, the bane of motorists' lives and a right pain in the nethers to cross at times... and I wonder how many even know about this or whether the name will catch on ... when they finally get home, will the motorists of this fair town put their feet up, wrap their hands round a well deserved hot brew and say "oh that *beeeep* traffic on Roger Millward Way was such a *beeeep* disgrace" ... nah not going to happen, ever.
I won't pretend to know anything about who or what Roger Millward was, some sporty bloke, so I've heard,  rugby league, really, really not my scene ...

I mentioned today and several times before that this road is  a pain to cross and that young men have been seen to turn into grey beard loons waiting, funeral directors have been spotted lurking for falling stock ... well some concerned person has put up a plaque to let the world know that those who wait may be gone but are not forgotten, not lost just gone before ...

To Build a Bridge v2.0

I may have mentioned from time to time the inconvenience to the folk of this sleepy little town of having a busy dual carriage way split off a good third of the town centre. Well never let it be said that nothing has been done about it. Lots of plans have been drawn up, many words have been spoken on the matter, numerous ideas have been proposed, indeed a whole mountain range of hot air, wasted opportunity, and best intentions has sprung up and been eroded to dust by the passing thirty or so years. But no more! A few months ago the silly EU flags were pulled down (& put in storage, you never know when they might be needed again things being the way they are just now...) JCBs cleared land and cranes and pile drivers appeared. It seems that at long last a footbridge will span the mighty A63/Castle Street so people on foot or in wheel chairs or on segways, bikes or unicycles or what ever can just waltz from one side to the other without waiting for the little green man. The price of all this fancy liberty? A mere £12 million.

Before I get too carried away I would just caution that the last footbridge built in this town took over three years to build with problems involving the contractor. And, right on cue, the contractor building this has recently gone into administration. There are, of course, promises that this will not affect the construction. Hmmm.

I bet you're dying to know what the bridge is going to look like. I can sense your jealousy ....

(Pictured "borrowed" from Hull Daily Mail)

The Long Wait

It's been a while since I posted about Castle Street and its problems. I know you'll be wanting to see how much amazing progress has been made in alleviating this black spot. Well I can tell you that, after the fourth delay, absolutely and definitely work will not start until 2020 at the very earliest and will almost certainly possibly be finished by 2025 that is assuming that the Highways Agency is still going then (they could all be drawing their pensions before this gets built) and as this is their most difficult project to date they might just swoon and faint with all the complications. Apparently the HA needs to "resolve technical and practical challenges" I hope that is official  speak for pulling its finger out but I doubt it. To put this delay into some kind of perspective, this country will negotiate its exit from the EU within a year and a bit  by 2019! A person might reasonably assume then that the delay is due not to technical issues but to a lack of political will. If this was in London then firstly the problem would never have arisen and secondly if it did it would have been resolved years ago. So, anyhow, I won't need to post about this for another three years, unless something happens again to delay things, which seems highly unlikely don't you think?

The glorious £250 million plan, in case you're interested, is, put simply, to drop the road at this junction by twenty odd feet so traffic can cross over it without traffic lights. Seems easy enough to this pilgrim but then I know nothing of the "technical and practical challenges". The video below allows you to fly along some future Castle Street, the way things stand this may the closest this plan gets to taking off.

A foreign country

I don't know what the protocol is with photoblogs regarding showing photos of photos; I did it before and no-one said anything so I'll try it again. So above we have the Princes dock as it was some time ago with trawlers parked up against Maurice Lipman's tailor shop (yes, that Lipman's dad). I have no idea who took it or when it was taken (1940s/50s early 60s even, someone will know)  and I do hope that lady crossed the road safely. The picture is on display in Zebedee's Yard as part of a memorial to lost trawler men, I'll show more tomorrow. Nowadays there's no road,  no trawlers and no tailor shop either. I think it's selling Apples (not the fruit). 

There were two other photographs on display so here they are to make the full set.

This is from what is now the Maritime Museum, that dinky little bridge in the distance is now Castle Street...

...and this is from the exit to the Albert Dock if I'm not mistaken.
(And I am mistaken; it's St Andrew's Dock!)

Use Alternative Crossing

I may have mentioned, from time to time, the troubles and tribulations caused to this wonderful town by the presence of the A63 sometimes known as Castle Street and universally regarded as a pain in the fundament. Well now Highways England which is responsible for all this decided to upgrade a pedestrian crossing and work commenced in October ... and here we are at the end of the first week of December with no crossing, no upgrade, no work being done, no workers on site, nada, rien, zip!. Questions are asked by Councillors as to just what on earth is going on here (not a lot, clearly). Highways England are the folk who have promised to improve this road but have yet to submit planning applications ("We're working on it", they say and have been saying for years) and if it takes this long for them to upgrade a crossing (come to think of it how do you upgrade a crossing?) then I shudder to think how long any improvements to the actual road will take. 

Just a little footnote here. This crossing is the most direct route to the Marina and Fruit Market area where many of next year's City of Culture events are happening. That all kicks off in a little over three weeks. Just sayin' is all.

Another day, another plan, another slogan

This is a slogan of the  property development company, Wykeland, eager to make a buck out of redeveloping the old Fruit Market and its surroundings. It is part of a slick marketing operation to sell the (£80 million) plans for not just a hundred or so new homes but a whole 'urban village' lifestyle whatever that may be. Well, judging by the company video, what it appears to be is people of a certain age (no older than 27, I'd guess) giggling, drinking coffee, giggling, drinking more coffee, giggling more  (presumably all that coffee sets off a giggle reflex) and so on as they live, work and play and their money pours into the coffers of Wykeland.

The video, so I'm informed, was shot in Shoreditch and Southwark in London as well as in Hull. Those places may well be able to support an 'urban village' lifestyle being situated in the middle of one of the greatest and richest urban populations in the world. The old Fruit Market is surrounded by water on three sides and the hell that is Castle Street on the other and is a crusty pimple on the bottom of one of the poorest cities in Britain. It will be interesting to see if the project gets off the ground. 

On a lighter note, if you are into meaningless slogans such as the one above, check out the mind blowing one below. Well D'oh!

 

Sydney House

I rather liked the look of Sydney House which sits along Adelaide Street and Cogan Street, two tree lined and seemingly pleasant avenues. As council flats go I've seen far uglier ways of housing a lot of people in a small area. Ah but would I want to live there? I'm afraid I am not worthy to share in the delights of having Castle Street on one side, Ferensway on another, the Salvation Army hostel just across the road and a neighbourhood (I think 'community' is the current must-use word these days) that is somewhat high on unemployment, social deprivation and crime. I feel I must leave these pleasures to others more fortunate than myself.

You're going the wrong way

Another helpful sign, this one on Castle Street.

As the town's traffic problems continue in the usual manner, (somehow Fridays are block-up-the-town days, verb sap to any visitors from out of town) a councillor was reported in the local rag as saying that there things were only going to get worse. It was he said "unrealistic" to expect more roads to be built to ease congestion. The council, he said, couldn't afford a survey into how to improve things, indeed the council cannot even afford to submit a planning application for a Park-and-Ride scheme. Brave, plain speaking you might think especially as the local council elections are coming up in May, but then the voters of this town would vote for a smelly dead dog with a red rosette rather change their ways.

For sale: One vote; never been used.

EU flags on Castle Street, Hull

To assuage the snarling, swivel-eyed, hoopleheaded little englanders otherwise known as the Conservative Party the utterly pointless prime minister has called a completely unnecessary referendum, in June, on whether the UK stays in the EU. I, like I suspect vast swathes of the country, couldn't give a monkey's arse one way or the other. I don't think it'll make a great deal of difference either in or out. So, on the principle (if you can call it that) of doing the opposite of what the Government wants me to do I'm going to vote for out ... but let me be clear I am not unreasonable and I am open to persuasion for a reasonable fee (cash only). Good grief there's going to be months and months of this boring euro-twaddle ... if I hear the word 'Brexit' again I don't think I can answer for the consequences!

The street with the hall

Hmm maybe the signwriter who came up with this didn't understand that 'Hallgate' is not the gate of a hall but the street with the hall on it, in this case Cottingham castle, long gone. Or then maybe she/he did and could'nt give a monkey's either way; it's not important in the grand scheme of things I must admit. And don't be misled into thinking this is some ancient watering hole. I remember it was Hallgate bookshop not so many years ago; books to beer is progress of a sort...

After I'd written the above I realised I've posted this pub's sign before some five years ago, it was looking a tad tired then. I think I prefer the new one. The cameras are still there, keeping us safe from whatever.

Burnett House, try again

Four years ago I posted about this property, Burnett House on Castle Street. Back then I mentioned how the place had been renovated by the Council but was still standing empty. Well the place has been re-renovated (is that a word? well it is now) and instead of being just office space it now has permission to be either retail/restaurant or office plus there are now no fewer than seven apartments on the upper floors. I came across some estate agent bumf on this property describing it as being "located in a lively area, already boasting a well established evening entertainment scene", surely they can't mean the dead and dying old town, can they? Also the building has "superb road connections" that is to say it sits next to the A63 dual carriage way, the busiest road in town which is due to be overhauled in the next few years (possibly decades?). 

It is however nice to see the hideous tatty propaganda hoardings come down but the building still seems to be sitting empty though ....

Bring out your dead

I mentioned so time ago that the old burial ground of Holy Trinity church on Castle Street stood in the way of proposed improvements and that a large portion of it would have to cleared. People were asked to make contact with the authorities if their ancestors were interred in here. Anyhow some work has started, all hidden behind a whopping high fence. However they forgot about the bit where the old wall stands so it's possible to hold a camera over and take a sneaky peek. They've cleared the gravestones and some kind of drill is in place. Clearly this has done irreparable damage to the place. At least the trees are still standing, hopefully the bat roost is undisturbed.

Now all this might be deemed fit and proper; clearing ground for development and so on, if the proposed road scheme were just itching to start. But, and this comes as absolutely no surprise, there is still no planning application in place and the Highways Agency now claims there are environmental issues it has to overcome. The start date is pushed back to 2020 or even later ... or never. I let you draw your own conclusion about the announcement of this further delay coming just after the recent election. You get the feeling we'll all be dead in our graves before this is started.

PS. I should add that all the exhumed bones will be reburied in an unspoilt part of the graveyard. And this from the local paper is advice to anyone who thinks their ancestors may be buried there to call the project team on 0113 2836805 or email A63castlestreet.hull@highways.gsi.gov.uk

Plan B? There's not even a Plan A!

Fish Street from Sewer Lane via Castle Street

*Sigh* With the inevitability of night following day the scheme to upgrade, improve or whatever you want to call it, the festering sore that is Castle Street has run into the docile buffers of bureaucratic inertia. Back in 2013 I posted that money was being made ready for this work and the earliest it could start was 2015 and as is my way I cautioned there might be delays. I hate to say I told you so but ... here we are two years later and those who should have submitted plans, the Government's Highways Agency, have yet to do so and don't look likely to act any time soon. (Surely the rumour that they cannot make a decision during the election run-up is a vile canard, perhaps not) So start dates are being pushed further back, 2018? 2020? Who knows when? Meanwhile the Council, for once not guilty of any misdemeanour and desperate to put some kind of bridge (iconic or otherwise) across the never ending stream of motorised madness in time for the City of Culture in 2017, is going quietly bonkers and talking about coming up with a plan B .... 

Finkle Streets

There are lots of Finkle Streets scattered among towns in the north of England. No-one is quite sure what 'finkle' means but the current best guess is a corner, bend or elbow; Finkle Streets tending to have an bend in them at some point. I know it sounds a bit tenuous but I don't make the rules. There's always an exception and Finkle Street in Cottingham is as straight as a Roman road. This Finkle Street runs or rather ran from old Mytongate (now the Castle Street/A63 dual carriageway) to Blanket Row and beyond where it bent round to the Humber. It's now nothing at all really and you wouldn't know it was there; there's no street sign or buildings or anything to let you know it existed. I only stumbled upon it and its history by reading an excellent little article by a local historian.

Expect Delays

I may have mention once or twice the problem that is Castle Street and that money had been agreed for a grand plan to alleviate some of the mess that is caused by funnelling a motorway into a inner-city dual carriageway. By now the detailed plans should be available, well it is well known that "should" butters no parsnips. These plans will not now be available until next Springtime (when birds do sing hey ding a ding, ding). I'm all for measuring twice and cutting once but to keep on putting things back will mean the actual work will neatly coincide with that other Hull problem the 2017 City of Culture. (One of themes I have heard is to be "Roots and Routes" so maybe it's all part of fiendish plan.) Drivers and that includes visitors to the cultural delights will be advised to take alternative routes, that is shorthand for find your own way through the infernal gridlock, matey, you're on your own! You have been warned.

Stench pipe

Earl de Grey, Castle Street

“Civilisation is the distance that man has placed between himself and his own excreta.” 

― Brian Aldiss 

There was a time, not so very long ago, when Hull was notorious for its distinctive stench. Not the all pervading pong of rotten fish that would drift across town from time to time, no this was something more down-to-earth. Sewage. Yup there was no denying that various points in town, notably Prospect Street, came with the odour of ordure. The drains it seems lacked gradient and we were, in the words of Churchill, unable to flush our own sewers. Step up, after much complaining, the water company and a big, and I do mean big, new drain and suddenly town smells as sweet as diesel fumes. Semper melior as they are wont to say round here.

Sewer Lane

Perhaps not the most attractively named of Hull's streets, Sewer Lane is, however, one of the oldest. It forms the southern end of what used to called Old Beverley Street which is now Manor Street, Land of Green Ginger, Trinity House Lane and Fish Street. Remains of a water course running alongside the lane have been found by those who like to dig up the past. An almshouse for fourteen poor women, Crowle's Hospital, was founded here in the 1660's and remained until demolished at the start of the 20^th century. The lane is now blocked to the north by Castle Street and has a mix of offices and social housing with views on to the marina.